Showing posts with label approaching. Show all posts
Showing posts with label approaching. Show all posts

Friday, March 18, 2011

200 Women In One Night!

Dear Speed Seduction® Student,

Only one thing pleases me more to hear that a student is kicking ass and taking names.

What could please me more than that, you ask?

No, not the entire UCLA Women's Volleyball team suddenly deciding that hugging me nasty in the dark is an obsession they HAVE to fulfill (Although I do love the UCLA Women's Volleyball team!)

No, what pleases me most is hearing that a student is actually helping out a fellow student to get amazing results.

Look: when I think back to what an incredibly tongue-tied, nerve-wracked, chicken-chokin' loser I used to be with women, it makes me want to cry.

So, when a student gets marvelous results, and then helps another student achieve the same, well, I'm about as proud as a hillbilly daddy in a roomful of virgin 13 year olds!

So, imagine my good feelings when I got the following email:

Hi Ross,

I thought the story of what happened last night might be interesting for Some of you - especially the newer SS students.

After the London seminar the Irish lads decided that we should get together and start to really push these skills forward.

After a number of bars we were all off the mark and had already got some great responses. Things were off to a great start - the guys had gone from not being able to open, to using blurt-outs, intuitive openers, humorous approaches, and some great sincerity, which we learned from the Gold Walk Ups DVD http://www.speedseduction.net/products/rj185.asp

The more women that were opened, the further the old beliefs faded. THE WOMEN LOVED THESE CHARMING GUYS.


I helped one student, Dan, with some of the exercises on your Fear Into Charisma DVD

http://www.speedseduction.net/products/rj180.asp


Here is the REALLY INTERESTING THING - he got some great smiles, some kino from these women, and out of about 50 approached women, only 2 semi negative responses. The energy was grounded before going out, and his state, energy, and awareness were totally controlled and supercharged.

After this, women were approaching him, and there was no more fear of approaches - he hit the100 openers mark by the end of the night.

Then came Selig.

This guy was amazing, he really got into the ritual before hand, and we reversed some of the energy surrounding his former fear of clubs when we arrived at the place.

After a little while Selig had hit 60 approaches. At this stage there was no stopping him.

Selig had moved from being afraid to speak to women, to a guy who was magnetic, charming, intuitive, and dynamic in a little under 5 hours. He broke the 100 approaches mark by the end of the night.

I'm sure the guys will have their own stories to post in more detail, but suffice to say, approaches are no longer a problem.

John Stein - Cork, Ireland

John, what can I say? A huge "right on" for helping out
your fellow Speed Seduction ® students. May you always find women with warm hearts, firm bods, and lots of moist relief!

Peace and piece,

RJ

P.S. Want to overcome YOUR fear of approaching women and know the 4 different ways to meet them anytime, anywhere, and never worry about what to say? Then check out:

http://www.speedseduction.net/products/rj180.asp


and

http://www.speedseduction.net/products/rj185.asp

And let me know when you top meeting 100 women a night!


This newsletter, and all of its contents are
copyright 2004, Ross Jeffries. However this
newsletter may be reprinted and re-used in
any format, without prior consent, provided
all content, including all links, are kept
intact, proper credit for authorship is given,
and the newsletter is given for free,
without charge.

Tuesday, February 1, 2011

Dear Speed Seduction® Student,

Over the years, I've had a chance to look at what really
makes permanent, large, personal change possible. I've
watched thousands of guys use my methods to go very rapidly
from no confidence with women at all, to ease, power, grace
and fun with all the women they could possibly desire.

And one of the big things they had in common, in addition
to buying and using my products, is…

......Consistency!

They didn't just listen to my products once, or give it a
few tries.

No.

They immersed themselves in the material.

In fact, I've gotten many reports of guys going so far as
to have my, videos, cd's and tapes playing all the time in
every room of their house, apartment or hotel, no matter the
time of day, on multiple tape players, VHS's etc.

Other students (including some of my current top guys)
have said that they took long drives out of town, often
hundreds of miles each way, with the tapes or CD's playing the
entire trip.

Now, personally, I don't think I could stand listening to
my own voice that much!

But immersing yourself in the material, in fact, immersing
yourself when it comes to any truly new way of thinking and
feeling and acting, is probably…

.................A Damn Fine Idea!

Remember, one of my key rules for success and power with
women, which I've repeated over and over:

Use Your Language To Capture And Lead Her Imagination And
Emotions!

****************************************************
Advertisement

If you want incredible success with women, why not purchase
your Speed Seduction® Home Study Course today? Just go to:
http://www.speedseduction.net/products/rj87.asp

**********************************************************
Well, the same is true with changing yourself. You've got
to learn to capture and lead your own imagination and emotions
on a consistent basis to take you where you really want to
go! And then follow up with your external behavior, in the
real world, with women!

Anyway, yesterday I got an email from someone who brought
up this very issue. So let's here from this devoted
client/reader:


"Hey Ross, I know you probably get a million emails a day,
but I felt the need to take the time to thank you for the work
you've put in to Speed Seduction and the Unstoppable
Confidence series. I've only received SS 2 days ago, but just
by listening to your exercises on visualization and overcoming
fear and shyness, I can already tell it's having an effect on
the way I perceive myself.

If you happen to get through this and feel like replying,
I'm just wondering if it's normal to feel sort of...hollow, or
feel almost a blank emptiness after doing these exercises?
Seriously, after I listen and study for a while I feel like
I've completely erased a part of myself and it takes a little
getting used to but goes away after a while. Any idea what
I'm talking about, or am I just convincing myself that I
should feel different?

Again, thanks a million and I promise to study hard and
practice as often as I possibly can. :)

-Tim T. New Castle, PA "


Tim,

Thanks for the kind words. I personally love the
Unstoppable Confidence tapes. They are one of our all time
best sellers, and still, over a decade after I created them in
1994, they stand up as one of my finest products.

While it's great that only after 2 days you are already
noticing some good effects, bear in mind that it takes a while
for big changes to take hold and feel real.

That's not to say you aren't changing already. You are.
It just takes a while for new feelings, new thoughts and new
behaviors to "feel like the real you". Most studies show
that, in fact, the time period for new ways of thinking,
feeling and acting to "set" and feel "natural" is 21 days.

My suggestion is to keep on listening to the UC Tapes and
keep doing the exercises. It takes some consistent(but not
heroic or hard) effort to get change going. And for goodness
sakes, make sure you are a member of the Speed Seduction
on-line discussion group where you can get 24 hour support,
encouragement and ANSWERS to your questions! Yours for free
when you buy your Delux or Basic Home Study Course. Just click
here at:

http://www.speedseduction.net/products/rj87.asp

That's it for this issue. Keep practicing, keep capturing
imagination and emotion (your own and womens') and keep on
keeping on!

Peace and piece,

RJ

P.S. Your success with women is waiting for you. Just go to:
http://www.speedseduction.net/resources.asp

This newsletter, and all of its contents are
copyright 2004, Ross Jeffries. However this
newsletter may be reprinted and re-used in
any format, without prior consent, provided
all content, including all links, are kept
intact, proper credit for authorship is given,
and the newsletter is given for free,
without charge.

Friday, December 10, 2010

How To Meet Women, Anytime, Anywhere, Part I

Dear Speed Seduction® Student,

One of the most common questions I have gotten in my 11 years of teaching Speed Seduction® is: what are some good and easy ways to meet women?

Recently, someone sent me an email, where, among other things, he said, “I hate going to clubs and bars, and at 35 years old, I feel out of place in them anyway.”

Now, this is one of the most common questions I get. And it's good to see a guy up there in his 30's still pushing for what he really wants.

Personally, as a 45 year old geezer who is as close to ugly as you can get without getting your face banned by the FDA, I still go for and GET women in their mid 20's(occasionally I will pull a 21-22 year old) and I never set foot in clubs.

But clubs or not, there ARE master keys for a guy of any age, to be meeting women, anytime anywhere. And believe me, this skill IS important.

You see, so many guys who are fixated on one girl, convinced SHE is the woman of their dreams whom they must have would actually dump her in a heartbeat if they knew they could go out and meet 10 hot women that same day they were pining over their 'dream girl"(who probably isn't giving them any anyway).

Hey…I'm sorry if I seem flippant here. But the reality is, the skill of meeting women anytime, anywhere, is crucial to avoiding what I call..

Relationships By Default!

You see, it has long been a theory of mine that MOST men don’t really wind up with the woman they really want. For most men, "dating" is such a form of roll the dice/crap shoot/gambling that they usually wind up settling for the woman who accidentally was attracted to them instead of the woman or women they really want.

Does this sound familiar?

Hey-I'm sorry if this seems harsh to you, but I call 'em like I see 'em. (And wow, did this ever get me booed and even physically attacked when I used to spout it on talk shows way back in the early and mid 90's.

Anyway, enough rambling. What I'm about to introduce you to is light years ahead of anything else out there, primarily because IT DOES NOT RELY ON CANNED LINES.

Yes, lines can be useful. Yes, lines can work. And I'll even give you some that are actually quite good.

But the key to remember is, with any line, it is the ATTITUDE that will determine how well the line works.


The Incredible Power Of Attitudes And Approach Positions


Basically then, there are 4 different attitudes or "approach positions"

The first one I'd like to talk about is one of my very favorite, and I call it "the Blurt Out".

The Blurt Out pretty much is what it sounds like; you "blurt out" whatever is actually going through your mind when you first spot the lady who has your attention, without any "editing" on your part (Ok, here's an exception: if your first thought is, "Damn, I have to touch those breasts!" it's probably best NOT to blurt that out!!

What I like about the Blurt Out is that it is coming from a place of vulnerability and sincerity. It's almost like you are thinking out loud, so women tend to automatically react without suspicion and be much more open and friendly to your approach.

The Blurt Out also works because you are implying something about your confidence, without saying it. What you are implying is, "hey, I'm a sincere guy, with real guts. I'm telling you what I really think, and I'm putting my head on the chopping block and handing you the axe. Will you be a horrible person and a coward and chop my head off or will you be as cool as me and be open to talking?"

The Blurt Out tends to work best with women in motion; either women who are walking directly toward you or women with whom you are walking parallel/side to side.

Just as an example of the Blurt Out in action, I once met a very hot 24 year old Canadian chick. I was in a parking structure for a shopping mall. She was walking up the steps, as I was walking down.

As I passed her I blurted out exactly what I was thinking in that moment, which was, "Wow..you've got style to burn!" just as if I was thinking out loud. She turned around, walked back down the steps and SHE initiated the conversation and later invited me to go get a beer.

That's the key to this approach, again. Just blurt out whatever you are thinking when you see her. Even if your thoughts happen to be shy or fearful, express what you are thinking, as in, "I realized if I kept hesitating, I'd never get to meet you and I'd kick myself for a week. So I had to come up and say SOMETHING. I'm "Your Name Here"

Can you see how totally sincere and disarming this approach could be? Especially for very good looking women who keep having all sorts of bullshit thrown their way.

The Blurt Out Plus The Implied Compliment

With an implied compliment, you don't actually say that YOU think the woman in question is hot or stylish or beautiful. You just imply it by how you state it.

Here's an example: walking around an outdoor mall, I spotted a woman who just walked incredibly gracefully. So I walked beside her and said, "It's just that I really admire women who carry themselves with grace and power..so I had to say "Hi"."

See the implied compliment? I didn't say it directly, I implied it. I said I admired women with who carry themselves with grace and power. Since I was talking to her, that must mean I think that about her.

But HER mind had to fill in the blank and apply the compliment to herself. Since this was an ACTIVE process involving her own mind, it wasn't perceived as coming from an outsider, but rather something she herself thought. And so it goes in without resistance!

This is a sneaky way to communicate, but you'll learn a lot more about the power of implication to move the thoughts, imagination, and emotions of women in ways you can't yet dream possible!

Approach Position Two: Observation, Comment or Question

The second approach position or attitude is what I call the "observation, comment or question". You can combine these with a sense of humor or just do them straight up, and they work best in a setting where neither you or the woman is in motion, so you have some time to make your observation.

The biggest advantage with these is they are non-threatening and you don't have to rely on anything canned to fit the situation.

(By the way, when thinking of something to say, one of the key questions I'll ask myself is, "What can I notice, observe or intuit about this person that I can use to make a connection? A good way to send your mind in the right direction).

Observations, comments and questions of course depend on the situation ongoing, and I usually quickly follow them up with something funny, often a put-on(which is our third approach position or attitude, so we'll get there in a minute).

Real life example: I was in a gas station, filling up my car. The woman next to me was putting gas in her giant white Mercedes. I said, "How do you like your Mercedes?" (See..simple question!)

Her response, "I love it. How do you like your SAAB?"

Ok, she's answering back, so I know at least she's friendly. I said, "I like it."

Then I jumped right to a put-on, which is an easy thing to follow up any comment, observation or question.

I said, "It's too short."

She said, "What? The Mercedes. I think it's pretty long.

I said, "No, it's too short."

She said, "What is?"

I said,"Life…to hestitate…when you meet someone you think is incredibly attractive."

She smiled and said, "Thank you!"

I then playfully hit her on the shoulder and said, "I was talking about ME!"

This got MORE laughter and then names were exchanged, and shortly thereafter, phone numbers as well.

My point: observations, comments and questions can be followed up with almost anything and combined with almost anything.

A favorite question opener of mine actually combines a question with a compliment, as in, "Do you do a martial art? You carry yourself with discpline and elegance..it's a very rare and attractive trait."

By the way, when it comes to compliments to pick up women, I prefer to IMPLY them or combine them with a question and I prefer to strongly compliment a woman on how she moves or her "energy". For some reason these are lot more acceptable and less threatening and perceived as more sincere than direct comments
about her looks.

Approach Position 3: The Put-On

Now we come to my favorite "approach position" the put-on. The put-on is simply a humorous approach where you pretend something to get her attention. For example, if a woman is walking in my direction and is wearing a t-shirt with a logo or design, I will look confused, point at the shirt and say, "I don't get it".

Usually, the response is, "Don't get what?" To which I always say, "The shirt. What's it mean?"

At this point, I almost always get an explanation from her about the logo or symbol, to which my response is to pretend to disagree and argue in the most ridiculous way.

Example: sitting in a yogurt shop, a young lady with very large breasts walked in. She was wearing a tight t-shirt with a slogan that said, "Free the Afghans"!.

I pretended that I thought the shirt was about Afghan DOGS. You know..the shaggy haired, long-legged dogs you sometimes see accompanying models in photo shoots?

I said, "who is holding a bunch of dogs captive? Why do you want to free them? Do you want more dogs to be strays?"

She tried explaining, and I kept misunderstanding. Then I made a joke about being so good looking I didn't need to be smart. Then I introduced myself.

If you want a good idea of the overall attitude for this approach, think of Bugs Bunny. Or Groucho Marx. Or Leslie Nielsen from the "Police Squad" movies.

One more example of a put-on approach. I was sitting in a local café and seated behind me was a very attractive young Asian woman. I observed that she was thinking very hard, talking to herself, trying to figure out her economics book.

So I turned to her and said, as seriously as could, "Could I ask you not to think too loud? You look like a loud thinker, and I have very important writing to do."

My friend, who was sitting across from me said she couldn't stop looking at me after that and could not go back to studying! I turned to her a minute later and said, "Look…I asked you nicely not to think so loud! Don't make me call the management!"

At that point, SHE began a conversation.

There are many, many ways to enjoy a put on. And you can combine it with an observation as in this last example; my observation about this girl was that she really was, "thinking loud"-she was having trouble trying to figure out what she was reading and so she WAS talking to herself, internally, in her head, which is a way of "thinking loud".

Approach Position #4: Genuine Intuition

The final approach position is what I would call a genuine intuition. This is more rare and harder to do. But did you ever find yourself just looking at someone and you just KNEW that person? Like something deep inside you connected with something deep inside them and you just KNEW them?

In this case, when this happens, go with your intuition and tell them what you observe. It's close to an observation, but the difference with this position is, it really isn't something you could pick up with your physical 5 senses.

This is advanced stuff that will come in time, so I wouldn't worry about it for now. But as an example, I was once sitting in my favorite coffee place. As this beautiful blonde woman walked in the door, I saw an image of her on stage, singing. So as she walked by I just said, "How long have you been a singer?"

It totally blew her away. And a long conversation followed. So if you have a strong intuition, just run with it and give it a shot. It's a bit risky, but when it works it has an incredible impact.

Ok. That's it for this issue. Next we'll continue to take up this thread and tell you more great ways to meet women, anytime, anywhere. Until then,

Peace and piece,


Ross

P.S. Want real success and power with the women of your choice, instead of the women you have to settle for? Your Speed Seduction® Home Study Course is waiting for you! Just go to
http://www.speedseduction.net/products/rj87.asp today!

This newsletter, and all of its contents are copyright Ross Jeffries. However this newsletter may be reprinted and re-used in any format, without prior consent, provided all content, including all links, are kept intact, proper credit for authorship is given, and the newsletter is given for free, without charge.

Tuesday, December 7, 2010

How To Meet Women, Anytime, Anywhere, Part I

Dear Speed Seduction® Student,

One of the most common questions I have gotten in my 11 years of teaching Speed Seduction® is: what are some good and easy ways to meet women?

Recently, someone sent me an email, where, among other things, he said, “I hate going to clubs and bars, and at 35 years old, I feel out of place in them anyway.”

Now, this is one of the most common questions I get. And it's good to see a guy up there in his 30's still pushing for what he really wants.

Personally, as a 45 year old geezer who is as close to ugly as you can get without getting your face banned by the FDA, I still go for and GET women in their mid 20's(occasionally I will pull a 21-22 year old) and I never set foot in clubs.

But clubs or not, there ARE master keys for a guy of any age, to be meeting women, anytime anywhere. And believe me, this skill IS important.

You see, so many guys who are fixated on one girl, convinced SHE is the woman of their dreams whom they must have would actually dump her in a heartbeat if they knew they could go out and meet 10 hot women that same day they were pining over their 'dream girl"(who probably isn't giving them any anyway).

Hey…I'm sorry if I seem flippant here. But the reality is, the skill of meeting women anytime, anywhere, is crucial to avoiding what I call..

Relationships By Default!

You see, it has long been a theory of mine that MOST men don’t really wind up with the woman they really want. For most men, "dating" is such a form of roll the dice/crap shoot/gambling that they usually wind up settling for the woman who accidentally was attracted to them instead of the woman or women they really want.

Does this sound familiar?

Hey-I'm sorry if this seems harsh to you, but I call 'em like I see 'em. (And wow, did this ever get me booed and even physically attacked when I used to spout it on talk shows way back in the early and mid 90's.

Anyway, enough rambling. What I'm about to introduce you to is light years ahead of anything else out there, primarily because IT DOES NOT RELY ON CANNED LINES.

Yes, lines can be useful. Yes, lines can work. And I'll even give you some that are actually quite good.

But the key to remember is, with any line, it is the ATTITUDE that will determine how well the line works.


The Incredible Power Of Attitudes And Approach Positions


Basically then, there are 4 different attitudes or "approach positions"

The first one I'd like to talk about is one of my very favorite, and I call it "the Blurt Out".

The Blurt Out pretty much is what it sounds like; you "blurt out" whatever is actually going through your mind when you first spot the lady who has your attention, without any "editing" on your part (Ok, here's an exception: if your first thought is, "Damn, I have to touch those breasts!" it's probably best NOT to blurt that out!!

What I like about the Blurt Out is that it is coming from a place of vulnerability and sincerity. It's almost like you are thinking out loud, so women tend to automatically react without suspicion and be much more open and friendly to your approach.

The Blurt Out also works because you are implying something about your confidence, without saying it. What you are implying is, "hey, I'm a sincere guy, with real guts. I'm telling you what I really think, and I'm putting my head on the chopping block and handing you the axe. Will you be a horrible person and a coward and chop my head off or will you be as cool as me and be open to talking?"

The Blurt Out tends to work best with women in motion; either women who are walking directly toward you or women with whom you are walking parallel/side to side.

Just as an example of the Blurt Out in action, I once met a very hot 24 year old Canadian chick. I was in a parking structure for a shopping mall. She was walking up the steps, as I was walking down.

As I passed her I blurted out exactly what I was thinking in that moment, which was, "Wow..you've got style to burn!" just as if I was thinking out loud. She turned around, walked back down the steps and SHE initiated the conversation and later invited me to go get a beer.

That's the key to this approach, again. Just blurt out whatever you are thinking when you see her. Even if your thoughts happen to be shy or fearful, express what you are thinking, as in, "I realized if I kept hesitating, I'd never get to meet you and I'd kick myself for a week. So I had to come up and say SOMETHING. I'm "Your Name Here"

Can you see how totally sincere and disarming this approach could be? Especially for very good looking women who keep having all sorts of bullshit thrown their way.

The Blurt Out Plus The Implied Compliment

With an implied compliment, you don't actually say that YOU think the woman in question is hot or stylish or beautiful. You just imply it by how you state it.

Here's an example: walking around an outdoor mall, I spotted a woman who just walked incredibly gracefully. So I walked beside her and said, "It's just that I really admire women who carry themselves with grace and power..so I had to say "Hi"."

See the implied compliment? I didn't say it directly, I implied it. I said I admired women with who carry themselves with grace and power. Since I was talking to her, that must mean I think that about her.

But HER mind had to fill in the blank and apply the compliment to herself. Since this was an ACTIVE process involving her own mind, it wasn't perceived as coming from an outsider, but rather something she herself thought. And so it goes in without resistance!

This is a sneaky way to communicate, but you'll learn a lot more about the power of implication to move the thoughts, imagination, and emotions of women in ways you can't yet dream possible!

Approach Position Two: Observation, Comment or Question

The second approach position or attitude is what I call the "observation, comment or question". You can combine these with a sense of humor or just do them straight up, and they work best in a setting where neither you or the woman is in motion, so you have some time to make your observation.

The biggest advantage with these is they are non-threatening and you don't have to rely on anything canned to fit the situation.

(By the way, when thinking of something to say, one of the key questions I'll ask myself is, "What can I notice, observe or intuit about this person that I can use to make a connection? A good way to send your mind in the right direction).

Observations, comments and questions of course depend on the situation ongoing, and I usually quickly follow them up with something funny, often a put-on(which is our third approach position or attitude, so we'll get there in a minute).

Real life example: I was in a gas station, filling up my car. The woman next to me was putting gas in her giant white Mercedes. I said, "How do you like your Mercedes?" (See..simple question!)

Her response, "I love it. How do you like your SAAB?"

Ok, she's answering back, so I know at least she's friendly. I said, "I like it."

Then I jumped right to a put-on, which is an easy thing to follow up any comment, observation or question.

I said, "It's too short."

She said, "What? The Mercedes. I think it's pretty long.

I said, "No, it's too short."

She said, "What is?"

I said,"Life…to hestitate…when you meet someone you think is incredibly attractive."

She smiled and said, "Thank you!"

I then playfully hit her on the shoulder and said, "I was talking about ME!"

This got MORE laughter and then names were exchanged, and shortly thereafter, phone numbers as well.

My point: observations, comments and questions can be followed up with almost anything and combined with almost anything.

A favorite question opener of mine actually combines a question with a compliment, as in, "Do you do a martial art? You carry yourself with discpline and elegance..it's a very rare and attractive trait."

By the way, when it comes to compliments to pick up women, I prefer to IMPLY them or combine them with a question and I prefer to strongly compliment a woman on how she moves or her "energy". For some reason these are lot more acceptable and less threatening and perceived as more sincere than direct comments
about her looks.

Approach Position 3: The Put-On

Now we come to my favorite "approach position" the put-on. The put-on is simply a humorous approach where you pretend something to get her attention. For example, if a woman is walking in my direction and is wearing a t-shirt with a logo or design, I will look confused, point at the shirt and say, "I don't get it".

Usually, the response is, "Don't get what?" To which I always say, "The shirt. What's it mean?"

At this point, I almost always get an explanation from her about the logo or symbol, to which my response is to pretend to disagree and argue in the most ridiculous way.

Example: sitting in a yogurt shop, a young lady with very large breasts walked in. She was wearing a tight t-shirt with a slogan that said, "Free the Afghans"!.

I pretended that I thought the shirt was about Afghan DOGS. You know..the shaggy haired, long-legged dogs you sometimes see accompanying models in photo shoots?

I said, "who is holding a bunch of dogs captive? Why do you want to free them? Do you want more dogs to be strays?"

She tried explaining, and I kept misunderstanding. Then I made a joke about being so good looking I didn't need to be smart. Then I introduced myself.

If you want a good idea of the overall attitude for this approach, think of Bugs Bunny. Or Groucho Marx. Or Leslie Nielsen from the "Police Squad" movies.

One more example of a put-on approach. I was sitting in a local café and seated behind me was a very attractive young Asian woman. I observed that she was thinking very hard, talking to herself, trying to figure out her economics book.

So I turned to her and said, as seriously as could, "Could I ask you not to think too loud? You look like a loud thinker, and I have very important writing to do."

My friend, who was sitting across from me said she couldn't stop looking at me after that and could not go back to studying! I turned to her a minute later and said, "Look…I asked you nicely not to think so loud! Don't make me call the management!"

At that point, SHE began a conversation.

There are many, many ways to enjoy a put on. And you can combine it with an observation as in this last example; my observation about this girl was that she really was, "thinking loud"-she was having trouble trying to figure out what she was reading and so she WAS talking to herself, internally, in her head, which is a way of "thinking loud".

Approach Position #4: Genuine Intuition

The final approach position is what I would call a genuine intuition. This is more rare and harder to do. But did you ever find yourself just looking at someone and you just KNEW that person? Like something deep inside you connected with something deep inside them and you just KNEW them?

In this case, when this happens, go with your intuition and tell them what you observe. It's close to an observation, but the difference with this position is, it really isn't something you could pick up with your physical 5 senses.

This is advanced stuff that will come in time, so I wouldn't worry about it for now. But as an example, I was once sitting in my favorite coffee place. As this beautiful blonde woman walked in the door, I saw an image of her on stage, singing. So as she walked by I just said, "How long have you been a singer?"

It totally blew her away. And a long conversation followed. So if you have a strong intuition, just run with it and give it a shot. It's a bit risky, but when it works it has an incredible impact.

Ok. That's it for this issue. Next we'll continue to take up this thread and tell you more great ways to meet women, anytime, anywhere. Until then,

Peace and piece,


Ross

P.S. Want real success and power with the women of your choice, instead of the women you have to settle for? Your Speed Seduction® Home Study Course is waiting for you! Just go to
http://www.speedseduction.net/products/rj87.asp today!

This newsletter, and all of its contents are copyright Ross Jeffries. However this newsletter may be reprinted and re-used in any format, without prior consent, provided all content, including all links, are kept intact, proper credit for authorship is given, and the newsletter is given for free, without charge.

Tuesday, March 16, 2010

Attraction Secrets Of The TRUE Alpha Male

Dear Speed Seduction® Student,

Recently, I got asked the following question, which has been coming up more and more lately:

"What's all this stuff about being a "cocky/funny" "Alpha" male? Is it true that "busting" on a woman and being "Alpha" is what it really takes to get the kind of hot women most men really want?"

You know, it's kind of flattering when I get these kind of questions. It shows that the huge numbers of Ross Jeffries impersonators and imitators are still falling flat on their faces trying to eat my dust in the "Get Girls" advice game.

Look: there is nothing wrong, per se, with being "cocky and funny". Hell,. I even gave advice on exactly how to do this way back in 1988 when I wrote my original book, "How To Get The Women You Desire Into Bed".

But cocky and funny, by itself, is not going to get you laid, unless you happen to already be so good looking that she gets a tingle in her clit just by looking at you.

What cocky and funny can do is get you past her initial, "Is this just another loser guy?" screening tests. It will get her attention, and hold it..for a little while. It will get you past her first set of screens and keep you in here…for a little while.

The Problem With Always "Busting" On Women!

The problem is, "busting" a girl like this eventually has to turn into something better and deeper or she is going to get bored, insulted and blow you off, unless as I said before, you happen to be so good looking you make her wet just by standing their.

Really, you need to take the advice you get from some of these "cocky funny" and "alpha male" dudes with a huge grain of salt. Can you really get women just by doing what a great looking guy does to get them?

Could you win a fist fight in a bar by doing what a guy who is 6 foot 10 and 350 lbs of solid muscle does to win a fight-just make sure you throw the first punch and then jump on the guy?

So, cocky and funny will get attention and get you in the door. But then, as I keep saying, you need to be able to lead the conversation into the topics and themes that are most likely to trigger her deep and intense feeling "recipes" so you can STICK YOUR DOUGH IN HER OVEN and BAKE YOUR COOKIES, good buddy!

Now, as for this alpha male crap-holy friggin' frijoles.

The stuff I read about this from my "rival" Gurus really makes me want to tear out my hair and scream.

First of all, these guys are postulating some kind of evolutionary biological mechanism in a woman's mind that somehow makes her ready for mating if you just act tough and push her around, and constantly show her who is the boss.

Aside from the fact that there is, in fact, no scientific evidence at all for such theories (and in fact, studies of our closest genetic relatives, the pygmy chimp or bonobos show the opposite-that it is the males who are co-operative and stick around to help with the infants that actually get laid the most!) it misses a larger point.

It is NOT that women like "Alphas", however badly defined that may be.

****************************************************************
SPECIAL NOTICE: To see a free video clip of me discussing the "nice guy/alpha guy" problem, just go right now to:
http://www.speedseduction.net/audvid/nomorefear.mov
***************************************************************

The reality is that humans, male and female, like and respond to LEADERSHIP. And LEADERSHIP has little or nothing to do with the silly, teenage, juvenile posturing and high school games these "Double Your Masturbating" guys are teaching you.

Now LEADERSHIP isn't just about being bossy or pushing people around. LEADERSHIP is about having a twin set of skills, a set of skills that both balance and compliment each other.

Those are the skills of being able to strongly guide and set the direction and also being able to listen and gather information.

The problem with always being "Alpha" as defined by wanna-be Ross Jeffries imitators, is that it requires you never co-operate, never relax or loosen up, and most importantly never listen to or gather information about the woman you desire.

In the mind of these buffoons(and I'm being charitable with the name calling here-these guys should be seriously horse-whipped) asking questions and gathering information about a woman is viewed as trying to "prove" or "qualify" yourself and makes you look like a pussy.

In fact, listening to a woman while you set a strong direction and remain in the lead is an IDEAL combination for rapidly appearing to her as very attractive.

Nice Guy Vs. Jerk-A Totally False Choice To Screw Up Your Mind

The problem is, we guys are given a false choice between two bad extremes:

1. Be the "nice guy". The problem with nice guys is, they
not only listen to a woman to find out where she is at, they actually wind up GOING THERE THEMSELVES, totally losing themselves in her emotions, desires and wants. They let her reality over take and rule their own! YUCCH!


2. Be the "jerk". Now, jerks have no problem holding a strong desire and intent. The problem is, they don't' care at all about a woman's reality so they never even bother really find out who she is, what would really deeply please her and so they wind up having to constantly recruit new women to sucker in! Again, YUCCH!

Leadership: The True Skill And Challenge!

The true skill set is being able to keep your own desire and intent strong, while at the same time recognizing, listening to, and gathering information about the other person. THIS ability is a core, key skill to not only being truly "Alpha" with women, but to being a leader in life in general, not just with women, but with men as well.

And this ability is part of what gives women that positive "vibe" that makes them drawn to you.

Another aspect of being truly "Alpha", in terms of being a leader, is the ability to look at what you are doing in your
behavior and thinking with both ruthless clarity and total and complete compassion and non-blaming.

You see, most people won't even look at their mistakes, for fear they can't correct them or for fear that they will hate themselves and beat themselves up over them.

And the few who will look at their mistakes usually get so depressed or angry about it, they fail to really ever correct them.

So I'm here to tell you that this very rare form of believing in yourself-the ability to embrace your mistakes and quickly learn from them without attaching pain, blame or self-hate puts you ahead of 99.9999% of the population on this planet.

And it is exactly THIS kind of super-rare real "confidence"-the confidence to move ahead and keep improving yourself and trying new things- that will make you massively attractive to women in a way that they won't be able to "put their finger" on.

Remember, unlike us guys, women pick up on "VIBES". This "vibe" of true Alpha will get them so hot and horny, they won't understand why they are wetting themselves around you. And you'll never have to put them down, act like a moron, or "bust" on them like a High School boy who's got a crush on some girl in study hall.

This is the real, dignified confidence of a TRUE LEADER, a
man.

True, Deep-Level Self-Control: Catnip To Women!

The final aspect of a being alpha is being able to gain control over your beliefs, intent, awareness and design for yourself the kind of person you would like to be. This requires not just the use of will, but also of imagination and envisioning yourself and your future. Again something that requires discernment, discipline and direction.

Are you really going to get this from grown men who are
still advising you act like a High School boy, "busting" on that cute girl in study hall?

I really don't think so.

Becoming a TRUE leader, a real "Alpha" may be a bit more complex and require more discernment, direction and depth on your part. But it's THE way to attract and enjoy women you can like, love and respect. Something the "Alpha/Pick Up" "gurus" haven't got a clue about and could never, ever teach about or tell you.

Think about it….

Til next issue,

Piece and Peace,


Ross


P.S. By now, you ought to realize, for all your own reasons, you WANT a Speed Seduction(R) Home Study Course! Just go to:
http://www.speedseduction.net/products/rj87.asp


This newsletter, and all of its contents are copyright Ross Jeffries. However this newsletter may be reprinted and re-used in any format, without prior consent, provided all content, including all links, are kept intact, proper credit for authorship is given, and the newsletter is given for free, without charge.

Wednesday, May 27, 2009

The Tao Principle of Balance in Motion

Today this question came in about the All-New Speed Summit Home Study Course:

"I am currently trying to decide whether or not to buy the Speed Summit 2008 DVD course. I watched your videos on YouTube and I really like your style, but I have just one question: You say that one should never be moved by praise or persecution. That is easy to say for someone who's been born insensitive. For me, however, it's exactly as good as the suggestion to not feel pain when kicked in the balls. I would really like to know if you are just giving spread-your-wings-and-fly type of advice, or are you also capable of teaching people how to actually do it?. OLav"


"Olav!"

When I talk about not being moved by praise or persecution, I am NOT talking about being insensitive. Far from it!

In fact, I teach an increase in sensory acuity so one can see what is ACTUALLY occurring!

I didn't say don't notice it.

I didn't say don't care.

I said don't be MOVED by it.

For example,

Praise: "Olav, you are such a great guy. Please loan me 1000 dollars"

Persecution: "Olav, you are so greedy. Don't you care about me at all? Loan me 1000 dollars"

In each of the above, the person is using praise or persecution in order to pressure you to lend him 1000 dollars.

To be MOVED by either would be to succumb to the pressure and loan the 1000 dollars, even if your intuition is telling you that you shouldn't loan the 1000 dollars because it would cause you hardship or you may never be repaid.

This is a very different from "feeling pain when kicked in the balls"

I didn't say don't feel it.

I didn't say it doesn't hurt.

I said don't be MOVED by it, meaning, don't waver from your honor or principle and trusting your instincts for the sake of the pressure/pain of praise/persecution.

And the more SENSITIVE a person is, the more they need to know this stuff so they can control their own destiny and not be manipulated by those who are less caring and sensitive - the selfish, the greedy, the energy vampires.

Make sense?

And YES, I explain exactly "how to" near the end of the first DVD, beginning of the 2nd DVD in the Speed Summit Home Study course.

It's called the Mental Horse Stance and Tao/Jeet Kune Do principle of Balance in Motion.

You'll also discover how to:

* Move with Dynamic Intention


* Harness The Power of Focus


* Influence Others Magnetically


* Live By Design, Rather Than Default!


* The One Word Concept that is the KEY to Mastering Life


* How To Protect Your Energy


....and MORE!

(this is all on the first DVD by the way)

Listen up. This 7-DVD home study course (over 13 hours of live seminar footage) is available at an introductory price 295.00 until Sunday Night!

After that, it goes up to 495.00, no exceptions or time extensions. So if you're interested at all you really should buy now.

Yours in the Tao of Huna Light,

Scott Bolan

Saturday, May 23, 2009

Using Time Distortion To Overcome Resistance

Richard Bandler, the co-founder of NLP has said, and I agree, that the best way to break through resistance is either go before it or after it.

What he meant is that rather than go after the reasons why a person has decided the way he or she has, get them to go either before they ever made the decision and see it a different way, or take them to an imaginary point in time of having already made the decision you want them to, link massive pleasure to it, and have them look back on it as heaving already been made. Since it’s already happened, it’s impossible to resist or do anything but relax, because they are about to get what they want!

Phrases for time distortion:

1. Won’t it be great after you’ve….

2. Imagine a time in your future….

3. Look forward to….

4. Looking back on….

After you have read all the blog post and implemented the knowledge to change your life, won't it be fantastic to look back and say, WOW.

Dr YJC

Wednesday, May 20, 2009

The Hawaiian Way of Life

Rev Vince Wingo Speaks:

This is absolutely amazing! I simply must share this with you!

As most of you know, Huna and Ho'oponopono were my birthright.

Dad was speaking Huna light and wisdom to me before I was even
born.

Mom told me I would always sit-at-the-knee of Dad and the top experts on Hawaiian Healing while they discussed Huna for hours and hours.

While my infant Uhane (conscious mind) didn't understand their words, my Aumakua (high self/super-conscious mind) was picking it all up all light-speed...

...this was a gift from the Divine!

... as I would find out just a few years later...

Since my earliest memory my job ... my mission ... my very purpose in life ... has been to share the Wisdom of the Ancient Kahuna Masters.

Since about the age of 4 dad taught me to understand Morrnah Simeona's goal: "To have the PEACE within the individual reflect through the community, society, the nation and the Universe. Regardless of race, or creed, the Doorways to the New Age are: PEACE, BALANCE, WISDOM and LOVE in all LIFE and CREATION."

He also taught me the great responsibilities of this, and over the years I've seen tremendous Huna Magic (Real-world results) occur in the lives of countless students clients and practitioners...

... soul mates found, dreams come true, problems solved, families repaired, healing of body mind and spirit, and yes... spiritual people finally breaking through to their rightful material manifestation.

It's nice to see folks NOT having to struggle. It's nice to see them having enough money to help themselves and others living a more comfortable life.

It's just a by-product of living in the Aumakua ... it's like wet with the water!

The two are inseparable.

Now imagine this - I'm living this and teaching this, and lo and behold I meet two like minds from other parallel fields - Dr. Yates Canipe and Master Scott Bolan!

Dr. Canipe is quite literally the founder of the modern men's self-help movement, a master of Neuro-Linguistic Programming, Ericksonian Hypnosis and Healing. He literally lays hands on people and helps heal them! He can put "Super-Speed" to your success, seduction, sales...you name it... and all from a place of the highest integrity and greatest good.

Master Scott Bolan discovered the Mental and Energetic Secrets of the Spirit-Force behind the Martial Arts. He's like the living embodiment of a Taoist sage, combined with the practicality of a modern warrior. Scott found the very essence of "Shen" (Spirit) and miracles occur around him daily! His greatest passion is sharing this knowledge with others...

Now imagine, what it was like when all three of us got together! Yes, it was nothing short of absolute magic. I don't know any other way to say it!

AND, get this; it was all caught live on film!

Seven DVDs of pure power, energy and knowledge, for YOU.

You can watch it at your leisure, in the privacy of your home. It's like having us there with you when you need us.

I've got to tell you it's the next best things to just sitting down with the three of us right in your living room.

You can get this dynamic home study course for the ridiculously low introductory price until May 31st (just a few short days away)


After that, it goes up no ifs, ands, or buts’...

.... so go ahead and make an investment into YOUR future, so that you too can live "the Hawaiian Way of Life"...

Whatever your choice, I wish you all the best. Thanks for letting me share this with you tonight. I am thinking of you and I know if you have goals, dreams and desires - they are all possible and this will help you accomplish them very quickly.


Mahalo,

--Vince
Rev. James Vinson Wingo, DD

Tuesday, May 19, 2009

Three Strikes and you are Out

Guys send me situations or material and ask for my comments. Sometimes they appear to be created and want to know hypnotically what if this happened. Others appear to be from discussion groups and they want another opinion. Evidently a guy went out one day and tried approaching women (I say tried because he failed) on three separate occasions and failed.

The second one seemed most interesting to me. The pick up line from the seduction home study course goes some like this: Excuse me, have you every been told that you are a shining example of genetic perfection. Or Excuse me, I noticed you and I think you are a shining example of genetic perfection.

NOTE: The main rule here is to notice her response and act accordingly. If she respond positively, continue. If she responds negatively, STOP.

So this guy reports that he says: Excuse me, but has somebody ever told you that you are the perfect example of …. Physiological perfection?

Two Comments: “BUT” negates everything in front of it. So he is saying that he is totally non caring if he interrupts, intrudes or not. Second, somebody is different from anybody. Do you know somebody who fixes cars versus do you know anybody who fixes cars. Is he emphasis is on fixing cars or a person who fixes cars: Which? Just a side, Physiological is harder to say and is different than Genetic. One is natural and the other achieved.

She responded: Thanks, but no they haven’t. And then she just walked away.

RED FLAGS: Her “But” is saying NO THANKS. And then she just walked away. NEGATIVE RESPONSE, STOP.

He keeps going: I think that people like you should be let known every once in a while how special they are.

He has now moved to aggressive. When do you hear the phrase “people like you.” It is usually not a compliment. He has passed judgment and has passed the point of observation. Yes, he observed that she was different in his eyes. Now he is insisting that she see it too.

She responded: Thanks And then walked away.

Hold on, this guy still hasn’t gotten the message. He is not letting her response guide his next move.

He now says as he is now following her: What was it that I said that was so threatening to you to cause you to slowly walk away from me as I talk to you.

And then she took off at warp speed.

Of Course, he just became a predator and stalker. He is lucky that she did not go get the cops.

I think this guy has good intentions and is just excited with a new tool that he doesn’t understand. He got a new tuning fork and is using it as a pitch fork. Instead of listening to and feeling the vibrations, he is using it to throw crap against the wall and see if any sticks. I also think his underlying belief based on this and the other two strikes is one of physical power instead of finesse and not realizing the difference.

Dr YJC

Monday, May 18, 2009

Could you explain the body connection to the mind and the relation to feeling better and staying healthy?

Not Here. However, our “Feeling Better” product can be the corner stone guide to wellness and staying healthy. Staying fit and healthy by boosting the immune system is just one area of the product.

However, I will let you know this. The Brain and human body is the ultimate chemical factory and can manufacture any chemical in the world. It is up to you NOW.

Dr YJC

Saturday, May 16, 2009

Economic Justice

In Erickson Covert Hypnosis you are not looking for the traditional or Hollywood eyes closed slumped over asleep response from a person. You are just looking for a phrase or couple of words to get past the conscious mind and find a home in the subconscious. On of the effective ways to do this is ambiguity. You use a couple of words that are not used together in the normal language. You do not define these words. They mean something to you. They mean something different to every individual that hears them or maybe they don’t mean anything to the person hearing them as they are new together. This is exactly the case with the term “Economic Justice” as used by the head man in Washington. He know what it means. Everyone else hears Economic separately from Justice and does not know what it means. No one defines it. Is it Socialism by another word? You choose.

More recently, Torture is the new buzz word. At first is seems that Torture was used to get worthless information. When it was shown without a doubt that the information obtained by the interrogation methods was indeed very valuable, then the rhetoric changed. It is now proclaimed that the valuable information that was obtained could have been gotten by “OTHER METHODS.” Again “other methods” is not defined or even one example given or a even a source of these mysteriously powerful “other methods” given. Evidently no one else in the government has or had any knowledge of said “other methods.”

Start listening with your other mind and other ears for other frequencies. Start paying attention to all your senses. Something may feel wrong, not look right, sound funny, smell odd or just leave a bad taste in your mouth.

On the other hand, as you read our justice ramblings, notice the good feeling you get. The sense that it makes perfect sense, doesn’t it. It rings true. Smells deliciously inviting as you just know the right track when you are on it. Ready to join us.

Dr YJC

Friday, May 15, 2009

Erickson Covert Hypnosis

We have been teaching Erickson Covert Hypnosis and NLP for specific applications since 1990. These applications include seduction, sales, magick/psychic influence, huna and business management.

It has come to our attention that the need, demand, interest has been shown in other applications.

The underlying principles are the same. Keep reading the Blog.

Dr YJC

Tuesday, May 5, 2009

Words That Sell

Recently a competitor had the courage to contact me and ask me why their ad copy wasn't doing very well.

It was easy to see. The message of the ad was soft.

A soft message is great if your market is soccer moms.

But if your market is those who are interested in becoming 1000x SMARTER, STRONGER, DEADLIER and MORE EFFECTIVE in the REAL WORLD, your message needs to be PENETRATING.

Otherwise, it won't jump out and grab their attention.

If your message is soft and unfocused, it will not sell.

It'd be like trying to hit someone in the balls with a pillow, and hitting them on the leg instead.

No pain. No gain. (as far as "getting the message across" goes)

Hard and focused, like a solid nard-smashing knee to the balls...

...now THAT's where the money is!

Also, that is WHAT and HOW I teach:

Whatever your goal...

HIT the target, WIN the trophy.

Smash the Pinata, collect the candy.

Capiche? Comprende? Understand?

Strike the root!

Are you ready to learn the root-striking methods of warrior kings?

Then catch it live on DVD, right here

Unlocking the Secrets,

Scott Bolan

Sunday, May 3, 2009

Is She Going To Call You? The No-Spin-Zone!

My sincerest wish for you is that you discover your inner strength and innate personal power so that you are not needy for women and ego validation through sexual conquest.

And that standing solid on your own principle, which you need never sacrifice for a relationship, you attract...

... not seek, not woo, not supplicate, not acquire through expenditure...

... a soul-mate who is hotter-than-hell beautiful and who possesses your values and beliefs!

Too often our desire clouds our judgment, and we assign values onto the object of our desire, values which do not actually exist in the person.

A classic example of this is assigning high intelligence or moral integrity to beauty.

While beautiful women can be intelligent and moral, just as often they are not intelligent at all and rather shallow, and would be the first to tell you so...

...but why should they?

They are enjoying the ride - the dinners, the drinks, the gifts, the attention, praise and worship!

Don't forget that they too have an ego that craves to be fed, why would they rock the boat?

They will when "something better comes along" and you will be left desolate and despairing, sinking further into the hole of neediness.

To stay out of the trap, remember this Bolan Mastery Key:

Do Not Base Your Sense of Self-Worth on the Approval of Women.

Matter of fact, do not base your sense of self-worth on ANYONE's approval. Ever.

To have the approval of others should be respected and appreciated, but not actively sought after.

To seek after it is your ego's craving to be fed.

It should simply come naturally.

And if it doesn't come?...

.... do not notice!

You will find that if you are going about your business to be the very best you can be as a Master Warrior of Life, the right one will notice you and reach out.

I always noticed when I looked like I was going somewhere, it got the attention of the beautiful women. Why? Because all the other guys are feeding at the troff like cattle....

....and here comes a stallion, going somewhere!

That is far more interesting energetically!

It "magnetizes"

Always remember these two things:

1. People Are Energy

2. People Are Magnets

Now, I received a question recently: "What should I say on her answering machine so that she will call me back?"

I use Bill O'Reilly's No-Spin-Zone rule: "If I leave a message twice, and they do not call me back, I do not call them again."

That's a great rule.

It means no desperation, no clinging, no neediness.

It means you respect yourself enough to not go chasing after someone like a love-sick puppy.

So what kind of message should you leave?

Plain and simple: "Hi, it's Scott. Give me a call. My number is xxx-xxxx"

That's it.

If she doesn't call you back? Great!

You don't want someone like that anyway. She did you a huge favor by removing herself from your life.

Keep it real and you'll never live a lie.

Hell is right here on earth for those who live in delusion.


Yours in Warrior Wisdom,

Scott Bolan

Friday, May 1, 2009

Spare the Rod and Spoil the Child, Attention ALL you Children

What kind of rod did your parents use on you. The metaphor is strong and what is the real message. I think every person want to find their soul mate, settle down, have children and raise their children in such a way that the kids have an opportunity to have it easier than they did, to go farther than they did, to experience more than they did. How they do that raises many questions. How much do you give your children? How do you insure that they earn it? How do you instill responsibility in them? The metaphor was not intended to be taken literally, meaning that if you don’t whip or beat your children they will grow up to be spoiled. However, there are several lessons children need to learn. There are consequences for their actions. There are responsibilities that need to be taught and expected.


If you are driving and forget to put gas in your car, then it will stop. If you run out of gas, you can cuss, you can pray, you can meditate, you can do anything you want and the only thing that will work is to put gas in the tank. Or you can simply say, I forgot to put gas in the car, now I am paying the consequences. And I will learn a lesson and go on.


So many people today are not taking responsibility for their life. They are blaming the government, the economy, wall street, the banks or the company they DID work for.


A call yesterday was from a young man talking about how he was investing in himself at this time. He said he knew his situation was getting better since he had started making that investment. In the next breath, he said he could not purchase any more right now because he had to wait for things to get better economically.


There was another young man who graduated from welding school 8 months ago. He has worked 14 days total since for three different companies and go let go by each. He has continued to make excuses about not taking a lesser job and when the stimulus kicks in he will be in the gravy. What will it take to wake him up? When do those who are supporting him wake up and stop?


If you are one of those who are procrastinating then WAKE UP. The knowledge and inner strength gained from the truly applied NLP, Hypnosis, Huna and Martial Arts is very believable and doable. The TOOLS exists. The technologies taken separately are absolutely mind changing. When they are taken together, consequences and responsibility take on a beautiful and brilliantly new meaning.


Despair becomes aspire for you.


Dr YJC

Tuesday, April 28, 2009

Can you give me some advice on Goal Setting?

You know what they say advice is worth. My goal is to give you some tools that you will use. The first tool is to realize that you already have goals that your mind is working on 100 percent of the time. The object is to consciously change those.

One goal setting technique many recommend is writing down goals. This is good. The results usually are limited. Think of it this way. If you are baking and keep opening the oven door to check on the contents, then what happens: The baking fails. Follow these steps to increase the effectiveness of your writing.

1. Write down in objective terms where you are now. I make xxx dollars. I have had three dates this year. I have a bachelor degree.

2. Write down a time frame. 6 months, 1 year, 2 years. Put this date on the outside of an envelope.

3. Write down in objective terms where you want to be in the stated time frame. I will be making YYY dollars. I will have had 14 dates. I will have my masters degree.

By making this simple adjustment, you are giving you subconscious mind the instructions and trusting it to do its job. Of course, if you set goals you do not believe, then you have missed realistic goal setting and missed the premise of this new dynamic of goal setting.

This will work for sales goal setting, performance goal setting, business goal setting, weight loss goal setting, fitness goal setting or professional goal setting. This is just one smart goal setting strategy.

For success in your personal planning goal setting, the secret is do it consciously and realistically. When the mind sees a new strategy that is working, it will quickly adapt it to other applications (goals). Practice, for example, is a great way to achieving many goals, this success will be the motivation to continue goal setting. You don’t need a big elaborate program for goal setting. Effective goal setting is can be short term or long term. The secret is how the conscious and subconscious mind relate to the goal setting idea and the help given the subconscious.

In coaching soccer, I gather the players around before the game and ask each the same question, “What is your goal for this game?” One replies, “To score a goal” I say, “Then you focus on that” Another says, “To assist on a goal” Another says, “To have a shutout” Another says, “To stay in the game at max speed the entire game” You guessed it. I tell each of them to focus on their goal for the game. And guess what happens to the team.

State your short term goal to your subconscious; out loud if possible as both conscious and subconscious (Greater Mind) get it simultaneously. Do It And Notice What Happens.

Your Guide to The Future

Dr YJC

Thursday, April 23, 2009

Is She Playing Games?

Here is the situation. Tony is 53 and looks 35 to 40. He works out several nights a week at the local health club. A younger woman shows up and starts working out. She is sharp in Tony’s eyes. He notices that she is a novice and could use some assistance. No one else in the club approaches or offers assistance. So Tony does. Suddenly, she is friendly so appreciative of the work out advice that she offers to take Tony to dinner as a token of her appreciation. He gets to choose the place.

During their workouts she shares that she is not married and never has been. She also states that she has a trust issue and that there was this one man who stalked her. She also stated that she has never been in love.

This goes on for about two weeks. No dinner. However they do seem to know each others schedule for the work outs. Then one night as they are walking across the parking lot to their cars another car shows up with a guy in it. She goes over to talk to the guy as Tony leaves.

The next time they see each other at the club she informs him that he does not have to stay until she leaves. He wasn’t planning to stay and leaves as planned.

Now suddenly, men are coming up to him in the club and wanting to know what is going on. Are they an item or what? Women are approaching him wanting to know the same thing. These are people who have been members for a while as Tony has, however they have never approached him.

The young lady now does not want to workout with Tony. She will take to him. He asked about the guy in the car in the parking lot. Oh, he just a guy I met in the sporting goods store last week.

So what is going on? Is she playing a game or not? There are inconsistencies in her statements. Tony wants to know what to do. First, she is playing some kind of game. Tony is there to work out and should stay focused on that as he always has. I told him to ask more questions as the opportunity arises and expect nothing except to find out her map of the world. For Example ask, “How do you know when you can trust someone” or “How do you identify a stalker” or “I am ready for that dinner and thank you for offering. Can we go to Jason’s Deli” or “How will you know when you fall in Love.”

Tuesday, April 21, 2009

Phone Number Leads to Failure?

There seems to be a rash of partial successes these days. I have had several guys call complaining about getting phone numbers and NO RESULTS. Well, they got a result; just not the one they wanted or expected. They have varied. One gentleman ran a few patterns; she seemed to respond from his point of view and asked for his phone number. He was ecstatic and thought he was on his way. She never called.



Another young man has had a lot of success IN HIS VIEW because he never got anywhere before and now he is getting lots of phone numbers. However, when he calls, they are ALL turning out to be flakes again in his view. They will not talk to him and are always to busy to talk.



Let’s talk about social programming first. In the south, most of the young ladies are brought up to be non-confrontational; that is to be very polite. They are told that even if they do not like the male who is approaching to be polite and get rid of him quickly by GIVIING HIM A PHONE NUMBER. They have no intention of talking with you. They believe that after one or two calls you will stop calling and they have gotten rid of you without hurting your feelings or being confrontational (saying they do not like you) or (you are not their type) or (etc).



Now listen up, no matter what course you are studying or what guru you like to think is right for you, there is something missing. It called calibration and/or test closing. You think she is responding strongly and then she flakes. IT IS VERY SIMPLE, FRIENDS. SHE DOES NOT RESPOND THE WAY YOU WANT OR EXPECT BECAUSE “IT IS NOT IMPORTANT ENOUGH TO HER (not important enough to her). You think it is and she does not. Now whose fault is that.



There are lots of ways to calibrate or test. Start by asking questions like: Are you enjoying this conversation as much as you seem to me.



In the end you must get confirmation. One traditional suggestion is to follow up the agreement to talk or meet again with this question: “How do I know that you will call” or “How do I know that you will be available to talk and we will continue” These short retorts may sound good on the surface. BUT stop and think about it. You may be coming off as uncertain and asking for reassurance. You may be coming off as whiney and needy (depending on your voice and energy).
Here is my suggestion. You ask the female. “I’m curious, How do YOU know that YOU will call”, “I’m curious, How do YOU know that YOU will answer and be ready to continue…”



This way you are asking for HER PROCESS as to what makes things important to her. If she does not respond or can’t respond, then you know you have more to do with her to make yourself MORE IMPORTANT with her.



Of course ladies, the exact same thing is true when you are dealing with what you perceive as flaky guys.


Dr YJC

Friday, April 10, 2009

Scott Asks, What Do You Really Want?

Dear Tom,


What do you really want?


Most people never know what they really want in life.


You ask them and they answer "I want hot women" or "I want to be rich" almost like it's a joke.


Thing is, it's not a joke at all. Think about the inherent natural language processing taking place.


The people who take it that way are the passive peasants.


Passive thinking is a lower level of thinking.


Einstein said "The world we have made, as a result of the level of thinking we have done thus far, creates problems we cannot solve at the same level of thinking at which we created them."


Get it?


Your world, right now, was created at a certain level of thinking. You cannot change it at the same level of thinking!


You're going to have to think differently...


...like a Warrior!


Are warriors passive thinkers?


Hell, no!


Can warriors be so highly effective that success is almost easy?


Absolutely!


The key is in Knowing.

If YOU KNOW what YOU REALLY WANT in THIS life, find me to the right and I'll show you how to GET WHAT YOU WANT!


Fair enough?


Scott

Tuesday, April 7, 2009

Neil says, There's a storm abrewin'.

What happens when good, responsible people keep quiet? Washington seems to have forgotten they work for us. We don't work for them.

Throwing good money after bad is NOT the answer. I am sick of the midnight, closed door sessions to come up with a plan. I am sick of Congress raking CEO's over the coals while they, themselves, havedefaulted on their taxes.

I am sick of the bailed out companies having lavish vacations and retreats on my dollar. And I am sick of being told it is MY responsibility to rescue people that, knowingly, bought more house than they could afford.

I am sick of being made to feel it is my patriotic duty to pay MORE taxes. I, like all of you, am a responsible citizen. I pay my taxes.

I live on a budget and I don't ask someone else to carry the burden for poor decisions I make. I've emailed my congressmen and senators asking them to NOT vote for the stimulus package as it was written without reading it first. No one listened. They voted for it, pork and all.

O.K. folks, here it is. You may think you are just one voice and what you think won't make a difference. Well, yes it will and YES, WE CAN!!

If you are disgusted and angry with the way Washington is handling our taxes. If you are fearful of the fallout from the reckless spending of BILLIONS to bailout & "stimulate" without accountability andresponsibility then we need to do this!

To become ONE, LOUD VOICE WHICH CAN BE HEARD FROM EVERY CITY, TOWN, SUBURB & HOME IN AMERICA. There is a growing protest demanding the President, his cabinet and our Congress, LISTEN to us, the American Citizens.

What is being done in Washington is NOT the way to handle the economic free fall.

So, here's the plan.

On April 1, 2009, all Americans are asked to send a TEABAG to Washington , D.C. You do not have to enclose a note or any other information unless you so desire.

Just a TEABAG.

Many cities are organizing protests. If you simply search, "New American Tea Party", several sites will come up. If you aren't the 'protester' type, simply make your one voice heard with a TEABAG.

Your one voice will become a roar when joined with millions of others that feel the same way. Yes, something needs to be done but the lack of confidence as shown by the steady decline in the stock market speaks volumes.

This was not my idea. I visited the sites of the 'New American Tea Party' and I saw an online survey showing over 90% of thousands said they would send the teabag on April 1.

Why, April 1??

We want them to reach Washington by April 15.
Will you do it?
I AM!

Send it to:

President Obama1600 Pennsylvania Ave.Washington , D.C. 20500

Please forward this to everyone in your address book. Visit the website below for more information on the 'New American Tea Party'. I would encourage everyone to go ahead and get the envelope ready to mail, then just drop it in the mail April 1.

Can't guarantee what the postage will be by then, it is going up as we speak, but have your envelope ready. What will this cost you? A little time and a 40 something cent stamp.

What could you receive in benefits?

Maybe, just maybe, our elected officials will start to listen to the people. Take out the Pork. Tell us how the money is being spent.

We want TRANSPARENCY AND ACCOUNTABILITY. Remember, the money will be spent over the next 4-5 years. It is not too late.
Please, Take Care!

Neil

"A Pro Iraq War Agnostic Atheist Activist, a Vet, and an Iconoclastic, Philosophizing Beach Volleyball Playing Grumpy Old Son Of A Beach!"